Hope Is A Very Dangerous Thing

Hope Is A Very Dangerous Thing

Hope Can Drive A Man Insane The following is an excerpt from my upcoming book. It's from a chapter on Pain and Guilt in estranged relationships and the danger of hope. You can’t explain what it’s like to mourn someone who is still alive unless you’ve experienced it first hand. This is what you’re doing now. There’s a sort of impermanence to the loss you’re experiencing because the other person is still alive. The most dangerous thing in the world is hope. Hope can carry us through the dark times and it can also keep us trapped in the cave. There’s no point in hoping things will go back to how they were. Sure, you think everything will be fine if it could just go back to the way it was, but it won’t. Remember, how it was before was most likely miserable. The stress, the arguments, the tension...these were all part of your ‘normal life’ prior to the estrangement. Hope masks this...
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HME 031: It’s Ok To Be Wrong

HME 031: It’s Ok To Be Wrong

Being Wrong Isn't A Bad Thing In this age of overwhelming ignorance, where people see opinions as being equal, being wrong is seen as something to be ashamed of. Not all opinions are equal and neither are all opinions valid. Sometimes, like the graphic says, you're just fucking wrong. Yet we live in a world where fewer and fewer people are able to admit it. Nobody knows all things, nor are they an expert in all things. Some of our best learning lessons come from our being horrendously wrong. Owning up to where we're wrong shows humility and a vulnerability that bridges divides. Only those who are invested in being right all the time would take offense. Abraham Lincoln is quoted as saying "I destroy my enemies by making them into friends". This saying isn't just about being friendly with those who hate you, but about being able to admit you held an incorrect belief about them. We've all either gained or...
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3 Simple Ways To Deal With Toxic Family

3 Simple Ways To Deal With Toxic Family

Toxic family can be the most potent poison. From the time you're born, your family, their words, actions, and beliefs shape the person you become. Some of this is intentional, and most of it is totally unintentional. In fact, it falls under the umbrella of "we've always done it that way". Your parent's beliefs were shaped by their parents, and their parent's beliefs were shaped by their parents, and so on and so on. Now, while your beliefs, and that bullshit story we all tell ourselves, was formed by our families at a very early age, that doesn't mean that you can just lay all the blame at their feet for the way your life turned out. As you got older, and your knowledge of the world around you expanded, you became more and more responsible for making your own decisions. So, let's assume for the moment that you've identified your toxic beliefs and are making progress towards changing and eliminating them....
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