Share Your Scars, Not Your Open Wounds

Share Your Scars, Not Your Open Wounds

Open wounds can get infected if you keep picking at them and don't allow them to heal. Sharing them with the world can spread the infection further than you realize. If there's one thing I preach constantly is that you should tell your story. Nobody else has the right to prevent you from doing so. Yet in doing so, you must be careful to share your scars and not your open wounds. We all get wounded in life. Whether through our own choices and actions or inflicted upon us by others, it's impossible to get through life unmolested. In the age of social media, it's easy to take to the internet and share your wounds with the world. The only problem is that displaying your wounds openly can cause infection in other areas of your life. Tend to your wounds and let your scars tell the story. Time Heals Eventually the wounds will heal and leave scars. It's the scars that tell the whole story,...
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Hope Is A Very Dangerous Thing

Hope Is A Very Dangerous Thing

Hope Can Drive A Man Insane The following is an excerpt from my upcoming book. It's from a chapter on Pain and Guilt in estranged relationships and the danger of hope. You can’t explain what it’s like to mourn someone who is still alive unless you’ve experienced it first hand. This is what you’re doing now. There’s a sort of impermanence to the loss you’re experiencing because the other person is still alive. The most dangerous thing in the world is hope. Hope can carry us through the dark times and it can also keep us trapped in the cave. There’s no point in hoping things will go back to how they were. Sure, you think everything will be fine if it could just go back to the way it was, but it won’t. Remember, how it was before was most likely miserable. The stress, the arguments, the tension...these were all part of your ‘normal life’ prior to the estrangement. Hope masks this...
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Christmas Isn’t Merry When You’re #Estranged

Christmas Isn’t Merry When You’re #Estranged

Unmerry Christmas Christmas. It's that time of year when everyone is a little sappier, happier, and love seems to fill the air. It's a time for friends and family, to celebrate the memories of the last year. Yet for many people, Christmas is a time of sadness and of longing. It's a time of mourning relationships gone by and of remembering people who are no longer here. And for some, it's a time that simply reminds them that they've been cast aside by those they love. This will be the second Christmas I am estranged from my two daughters. I know there will be no cards in the mail, no text messages coming from them. They've made the decision that they don't want anything to do with their dad. That's the choice they've made. Honestly, since everything went down, I dread the holiday season. Actually, my dread begins in early November, my birthday month, and runs through the first of the year. Last year I didn't put...
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