Snart’s Rules For Success – HME Live 001

Snart’s Rules For Success – HME Live 001

Leonard Snart is a bad guy in the DC universe. He can be seen on The Flash and on Legends of Tomorrow. Yet there is a softer, good side to Snart that shows up from time to time. In a recent episode of The Flash, he offers some sage advice to young Barry Allen about what it takes to pull off a successful heist. He says there are 4 steps to a successful plan: Create the plan Execute the plan Expect the plan to go off the rails Throw away the plan In this episode of the podcast I discuss how we all follow Snart's first two steps and how successful people make their bones in steps 3 and 4. Being flexible about your methods for success allows you to adapt to all the crap life throws at you. Sometimes the best bit of advice is: Be stubborn about your goals, but flexible about your methods. Truly successful people are able to improvise, adapt, and...
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Language Exists To Woo Women

Language Exists To Woo Women

There's a scene in Dead Poet's society where Robin Williams talks about the purpose of language and how words and ideas can change the world. In this scene, he relays this bit of wisdom: The purpose of language is to woo women. Now, in the context of the movie that makes perfect sense as they're talking about poetry. Yet, in today's world, that bit of movie wisdom holds true. Unfortunately, though, most people have forgotten how to communicate with power, precision, and emotion. We've gone from the language of poets to the simple minded idiocy of speaking text. The ability to communicate, to use the full power of language, is a lost art. We now speak to convey as much information as we can in as little verbal effort as possible. Don't get me started on the written word, as our society's ability to convey complex thoughts and emotions has been replaced by clickbait headlines and hyperbole. Language is the key to being successful....
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Six Sexist Things To Stop Telling Our Sons

Six Sexist Things To Stop Telling Our Sons

Sexist language is deeply ingrained in our society's image in what it means to be a boy. As we learn and grow as a society we should also seek to redefine manhood. Let us throw away the old sexist stereotypes of what a 'boy' should be and move towards a more positive and affirming celebration of each child's individuality. You ___ like a girl Probably the most common sexist thing we tell boys, that they hit/throw/run like a girl. This tells our sons that only boys can be good at sports and that girls are naturally non-athletic. Add to this the societal value we place on being part of a sports team, telling boys this can destroy their self-esteem before it has a chance to develop. Boys will be boys No. We say this when boys are aggressive towards others, in particular whent they're aggressive towards women. Boys may be boys but that doesn't mean being an asshole is the measure of what...
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HME036 – Redemption: It Takes Two To Tango

HME036 – Redemption: It Takes Two To Tango

Redemption Scripture tells us that all things can be redeemed. Even if in life it seems like there's no way that's possible. Redemption in personal relationships, however, is a bit trickier. When relationships go south, 99.9% of the time no single party is at fault. It's usually that same percentage in fractured relationships where one party refuses to see or admit their part. This makes redemption impossible. For relationships to be redeemed, both parties have to want it and both parties have to be able to forgive and ask for forgiveness. This is an episode from the archives, when I believed that the redemption of my relationship with my family was just around the corner. The date of this episode is June 2015. In the two years since, I've learned to accept the lessons I talked and taught about in this episode. In particular, that redemption has to be a two way street. Without both parties wanting and working at it, any attempt to redeem a relationship...
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13 Reasons Why – A Parent’s Perspective

13 Reasons Why – A Parent’s Perspective

13 Reasons Why is a new Nexflix series based on the 2007 novel Thirteen Reasons Why by Jay Asher. The show revolves around a student who kills herself after a series of culminating failures, brought on by select individuals within their school. While it has received some critical acclaim for addressing a difficult topic in a fairly real and unfiltered way, it has also received a great deal of criticism. The criticism appears to revolve around a few common points that don't really have a great deal of evidence to back them up. "It needs a trigger warning" The series is adapted from a book that tells a story that involves suicide, date rape, and bullying. That is the motif of the story. To be perfectly straightforward, I'm not sure what more of a 'warning' is needed. All of the info about the story is freely available on the electric internet machines the kids are using today. "It simplifies suicide as someone else to blame" I...
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Are Millennials Entitled Little Shits?

Are Millennials Entitled Little Shits?

The Entitled Generation A lot has been written about the millennial generation: they’re spoiled, entitled, soft, unable to deal with simple social situations, etc. A with any stereotype or generalization, there is a kernel of truth in what they say. Statistics and studies are beginning to detail how this generation has a higher incidence of depression and social anxiety. Simon Sinek recently pointed to one that showed more and more millennials are taking leave from college due claiming depression. In fact, the millennial generation is on track to have the highest percentage of members with mental health challenges. You have to stop and ask why. Why are so many millennials so unbalanced? It’s a complex issue that has no simple answer. Helicopter Parents My generation, Gen X, is the generation that bridged the ‘simpler times’ of the Boomer years and the social media/internet generations of the millennials.  We were the first generation to grow up with home video games, home computers, cable television, and the...
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Integrity: The Less You Use It, The More You Have

Integrity: The Less You Use It, The More You Have

Integrity is defined as: the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness. the state of being whole and undivided Society today has an integrity deficit. Instead of trading in truths, bullshit and lies are the currency of the times. It doesn't matter if it's in relationships, in the workplace, or on the teevee. There is a serious deficit of people who have integrity and are congruent. Nowhere is this more visible than in the political realm. Just today I caught the tail end of an interview with Dr. Gina Loudon. Her brand is built on honesty, truth, and being a psychological, political, and social commentator. Now, according to her bio she's well educated. Yet in this interview 99% of what came out her mouth was bullshit and lies. Not little ones either. Big, flaming, disproved with 8 seconds on the Google lies. What does this say about her and her brand? What does this say about her expertise? Honestly, what it...
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10 Ways To Sabotage Yourself And How To Stop

10 Ways To Sabotage Yourself And How To Stop

You are your own worst enemy. It's not the haters or the critics that will destroy you and your dreams, it's you. You can and do sabotage yourself all the time. The biggest impediment to your success is the distance between your ears. Get Lazy Everyone feels unmotivated from time to time. It's ok to rest, just don't let the rest become permanent. Try To Look Good People can tell when you're putting on a show. They can smell bullshit a mile away. Be authentically you. Always. Operate From Fear Fear brings scarctiy. Operate from gratitude and the abundance will follow. Try To Be Liked/Loved You can't please everyone, so don't even try. Stay true to yourself and you'll reach who you're supposed to reach. Your vibe attracts your tribe. Listen To the Naysayers As Gary Vaynerchuck says - Respect everyone. Listen to noone. The peanut gallery wants to see you fail because they failed. Avoid Being Responsible When you screw up, own it. Period. Refuse...
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The Titanic Poster On My Wall And Masculinity

The Titanic Poster On My Wall And Masculinity

When you think of a "manly" movie it's a pretty safe bet that Titanic doesn't make the top 50. It's universally thought of as a "chick flick" with almost no redeeming "manly" qualities about it. Yet when I think of it, I see it as not only a great love story, but Leonardo DiCaprio's Jack exemplifies a lot of what a man truly is. Titanic starts out with Jack taking hold of his future by winning a card game. The rest of the movie he seeks to prove he's more than his station in life. Yes, his life ends tragically by freezing to death in the ocean but for a few days he grabs the golden ring. Oh..and while, yes, there was room on the door for both, odds are the wood wasn't buoyant enough for the weight of two people. I love that movie. In fact, I still own the two cassette VHS version. At one point I even had the framed movie poster hanging...
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Steve Harvey: Jump To Be Successful

Steve Harvey: Jump To Be Successful

Jump - But Test The Depth First If you've been on Facebook more than 20 minutes, you've either seen this video or memes created from it with Steve Harvey saying if you want to be successful, you have to jump. While on one hand I agree with this advice, on the other hand I don't. Yes, if you want to be successful you have to take risks, yet there's a difference between risk and risky. My good friend Sam Crowley explained it this way: Risk is driving down a road at 100 miles an hour. Risky is doing the same thing at night, with no lights on, and drunk. Too many people jump into the water without testing the depth first. Growing up, we would go cliff jumping in the lakes in Arizona. We'd climb up the side of a mountain, swallow hard, and then leap into the water below. While yes, to jump off a cliff is to take a risk, we never did...
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